She may be a hot gestating mess, but it turns out that Pregzilla is actually the most normal/sane/classy (no, really) person in her little universe. Aside from her living situation, which is sad and not blog fodder (she financially supports a lot of people), her baby daddy (whom we’ll call John Mayer, because he is [...]

A customer sneered at me and spat, “Is English your FIRST language?” in a tone I’m certain she reserved for the help. As I relayed the story of the encounter to my coworker, a woman of about 55, she sighed, “Did I really stop hooking for this?” That’s a universal philosophical question: Did we ALL [...]

This might turn out to be one of the more astute observations I’ve made. Considering astuteness is sort of what I pride myself on, that’s saying something. For now, back to the beginning… It all started when one of my Assistant Store Managers (there are two) was transferred to another city. He was my favorite. [...]

…and I feel fine. The Checkout Girl’s Three Simple Rules Of Supermarket Etiquette, Storm Edition 1. TAKE IT DOWN A THOUSAND. Seriously, if you panicked like a little sucky baby at the first whisper of the “s” word and ran to the store to stock up on expensive meats and cakes, why would you assume [...]

Boss: “Why are the ‘New Baby’ cards filed under ‘Sympathy’?” Me: *raises eyebrow* Boss: “Every time I start a conversation with you, I immediately regret it.” *pic borrowed from whythefuckdoyouhaveakid.com